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things to do in burbank when you're dead lame...

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I will only go to this sad sad event if the following happens:

I want Butch and Porky from the Little Rascals to double-team Traci Bingham on the Batmobile. While this is going on, the scary girl from The Ring will pass by eating pancakes and see this grotesquely alluring turn of events, prompting her to vomit all over nearby Barry Williams. He will in turn vomit on Frank D'Amico who will then vomit on Tiffany AND William Katt. Lou Ferrigno will see all this, be kinda pissed that no one vomited on him and--while Hulking out---jump into the Back To The Future Delorean with Lainie Kazan. Unfortunately, he will not be able to get up to 88 mph because Penny Peyser and Allyce Beasley will be in the way risking their lives!!! So he'll get out of the car, only to be reprimanded by Betty Lynn. Then they will....awwwwwwwwww, WTFever.

I lost interest when Don Knotts dropped out anyways.
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