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an open letter to abc concerning nick and jessica's tour of duty...

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Dear ABC,

Sorry, but there is no way in hell I am watching your upcoming super-special Nick and Jessica's Tour of Duty.

I wish I could say that I'm afraid. Afraid that maybe, just maybe, I might watch the show and get totally wrapped up in Nick and Jessica's overwhelming love for each other. Look! It's bursting out! Their love! All over each other and all over those poor military men and women's faces! Love everywhere!! Can't you see it! Let's revel in it!

No thanks. Why would I want to get all caught up in that? It's like that time that someone tricked me into watching Dead Man Walking. I watched it, got all emotional about Sean Penn and his trials and tribulations...then he died. Nooooo!!! If I invest the emotions, there needs to be some kind of happy ending. If I wanted to watch real life, I would have rented a documentary. I want Sean Penn either digging out of prison with a spoon or inexplicably dressing up like a woman to sneak out past the guards. And then, once he's out, I want a big song and dance routine with rainbows and kittens and stories about childhood.

But, I digress. As you can see, I've seen through your shenanigans. Nick and Jessica are just going to officially break up after this special airs. It's written in a contract somewhere in your contract department in a contract drawer that they must keep up the happy front for good PR. Well, you know what? PR can ruin lives. Stick that on your happy website.

Sendcelery,

Me
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Posted by Anonymous carolinacutie on 3:08 PM

No. They are not breaking up. Stop telling lies! I will not believe another word you say about Nick and Jessica. They are MEANT TOOOO BEEEEE.

And I will watch the Tour of Duty like it's the freakin' Icecapades.  



Posted by Blogger justin on 3:10 PM

ABC loves you.

Tell all your friends.  



Posted by Blogger Ourglass on 7:15 PM

Too bad people make such decisions without all the facts. I did watch the special (oddly, there was nothing else but immoral trash on the 200+ channels). I was honestly touched by the obvious love/respect/thanks/appreciation for the troops. I really don't care what the world thinks of the decisions of the Administration, what I care about is that people take time out of their day to thank the men/women making the real sacrifice (so you can maintain websites with your personal views like this one).

Sad, you missed a real chance to connect with the troops overseas.

A.M, author - Final Destination: Rest

Was also great to hear God bless so often, a few prayers for our troops would go a long way.  



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