jeremy piven: your polo party planner...
"No, really. Polo it out, bitch."
"Yeah, Gina Glickman. Horses charity blah blah blah. Back to the Piven. Also, you're looking very mannish in the face. Maybe you should use some concealer next time. And when I say concealer, I mean a paper bag. Okay, enough free tips. Back to the Pivs."
"I like you. I respect you. But you're really creepy to look at when you're outside the Actor's Studio. So if we're going to take a picture together, I'm just going to put on my sunglasses to hide the fear in my eyes. Oh damn. I forgot to give you any context to that statement. That vest makes you look like a backwoods rapist. Seriously. You're not going to be able to say anything at the pearly gates if you wear that."
"Who the hell is this guy?"
"Looking straight ahead. Looking straight ahead. Looking straight ahead."
"You guys can caption this as "The Piv's stock is rising" or "Piv gets drunk and rowdy and starts shooting fake guns in the air." Either one. Your choice. Now...come watch me bang the hell out of that fence over there."
I don't question anything Piven does. I just instantly start copying and hope for the best.
Posted by Anonymous on 1:41 PM
I bet he speaks in third person.
Meme... don't question the Piv, the Piv wears two shirts or 10 shirts, or whatever the f#$% the PIv wants.. deal.
The Piv thanks you Justin for your comment.
The Piv must go now, lookin good is damn hard work.
Posted by xanadian on 5:53 PM
hilarious. Yes, Mr Tea Man (as I like to call Lipton) does look a bit scary with that vest thing going on...
Posted by Kate Borrell on 4:36 PM
It's his hair that freaks me out.
Is that hair? Is that his hair? Did it grown from his head or was it transplanted from his back?
Posted by Justin on 9:04 PM
I'm not gay. But I do appreciate all dickhead comments such as yours.
And thanks for signing up for a fake blogspot just to write it. That was so cool of you.
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