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an open letter to netflix regarding why they suck complete ass...

Dear Mr. Netflix,

If you don't send me the season one discs of Entourage soon, I might just bludgeon your entire family with a garden rake. I don't own one, but I will go to the Home Depot and buy one exclusively for the purpose of ending our online-rental relationship (and Mrs. Netflix and Netflix Jr.'s lives) to prove a point. I'm so serious about this it hurts. I haven't had those DVD's at the top of my queue for a month and a half for my health. They are there and they've been there since the "Very Long Wait" days. I don't even care what order you send them in. Friggin' surprise me. I've already seen most of the episodes. I just don't want to buy the crap for $40. You suck for making me this angry. I friggin' defended you when Blockbuster started offering handjobs and sno cones for people to switch over. And this is how you treat me? Oh, btw, I made a mix CD with a bunch of hate songs (like a 12-year-old girl) and sent it back to you in the place of Kung Fu Hustle this week. Enjoy it. If you don't rectify the situation, there will be more. I've got the Internet and Amoeba Records at my disposal for finding some truly shitty emo music that will make you light yourself on fire with hate if you don't.

I'm so not kidding,


Stop recommending JLo movies. You know that I hate her. It's beyond funny now.

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Posted by Blogger Fun Joel on 6:59 PM

Dude! How could I possibly miss the handjobs-from-Blockbuster offer? Man! And btw, Gunnii sounds totally, uh... Phat, yeah!  

Posted by Blogger Charlie on 8:16 PM

Those fuckers. Reminds me of a post I recently read that you'd probably appreciate:


Check out the Netflix watchdog sites that are linked here. Insane shit....  

Posted by Blogger Stephy on 9:05 AM

You are way too funny! That Netflix thing was priceless! Maybe I will never use them now. There's always a price for convience  

Posted by Blogger justin on 9:25 AM

joel - bring it, uh, on

charlie - yep, that's the whole "throttling" issue. sounds like something out of top gun but it's not.  

Posted by Blogger Jenny on 9:35 AM

hysterical. really.  

Posted by Blogger Sonoria on 9:39 AM

I thought you didn't like Entourage Season Uno?  

Posted by Blogger justin on 10:07 AM

It's true. But I heard I missed some of the best ones. So I was going to give it a chance.  

Posted by Anonymous krissy on 1:32 PM

I swear, if you don't put "Put the Camera On Me" at the top of your Netflix queue for me, I'm going to go all Robert Blake on your ass!  

Posted by Anonymous Anonymous on 5:14 PM

Hi, this is Reed Hastings, Founder and CEO of the world's greatest company, Netflix. I take great pride in the satisfaction of my customers, and - JUST KIDDING I WILL FUCKING HUNT YOU DOWN AND KILL YOU DEAD FOR DEFAMING MY OPERATION! DON'T FUCK WITH ME!

Thanks for being a member of the Netflix family.



Posted by Blogger justin on 5:20 PM

Best comment ever.  

Posted by Blogger VinceJose on 3:09 PM

I must have thought that outloud. I know there must be more important things going on in the world right now than me not getting my DVDs, but I can't think of what they are because of my blind blood boiling rage.  

Posted by Anonymous Anonymous on 6:31 AM

Wow, thanks for that, good stuff!  

Posted by Anonymous Anonymous on 9:11 PM

Once I played AOC, I did not know how to get strong, someone told me that you must have aoc gold.He gave me some conan gold, he said that I could buy age of conan gold, but I did not have money, then I played it all my spare time. From then on, I got some cheap aoc gold, if I did not continue to play it, I can sell aoc money to anyone who want.  

Posted by Anonymous canada goose jackets on 10:30 PM

Anyway,I would like to give you some tips when you shopping online for canada goose jackets. First ,you ought to know that a boots marketed is filled with the so calledugg Wed like to know more about your designs for your store. Could you provide us with the following information below boots but do you know authentic boot are all produced in China they are not actual sheep skin canada goose down jacket.  

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